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Showing posts with label Life Challenges. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Life Challenges. Show all posts

Wednesday, April 16, 2014

I Care Full-Time For My Disabled Partner And Need A Break

I am a man in my early 50s. I have been caring full time for my partner who is 10 years younger for many years. She has a rare genetic disability that has got worse over the years and I had to give up work to look after her. As our previous accommodation came with my job, we had to move out and were rehoused by the council into a two-bedroom flat.

I have found that the stress of caring for her constantly, without any breaks, has got harder. It's been years since we've been able to go away, and one day just slips into another. We are both very isolated due to the nature of her disability and neither of us has any family to speak of. We have gradually lost touch with friends and associates.

We did try to get some help from social services but they haven't been much help as we would have to pay for any care or respite and we can't afford it. This is now compounded by the recent benefit changes and having to pay the "bedroom tax" for our so-called spare bedroom – my partner sleeps in there. I am still quite a few years off retirement and don't know if I can hang on that long the way things are going.

I am aware of a local carer's group but it's difficult being a man, and it's difficult for me to leave my partner.

The only other way I have found of making contact with others in similar situations is through social media and chat rooms for carers and I am a private person. Really, it would be so nice to escape all this occasionally and do something to take my mind off it all.

I'm sorry if this sounds self-pitying, I try not to be, but we all need things in life to look forward to. This isn't a life for either of us really, and I don't know when it will all end. I still love my partner a lot and want her in my life, but not like this.